Empowering Emotional Resilience
At Parts of Us Coaching, I guide men to deepen emotional intelligence, befriend their parts, and build professional resilience through Internal Family Systems and the Enneagram. Embracing neurodiversity and personal experience, I support authentic growth beyond societal constraints. Join me to understand and transform your inner world with compassion and strength.
Get to Know Tom O'Reilly, author and coach
Anti-Colonial Worldview
Experience coaching that supports a worldview critical of patriarchy and colonization, fostering authentic self-expression and cultural respect. I will support you as you navigate the grief and anger of living in these times and the relationships that can't hold space for your truth.
I honor the Lenape and other Indigenous caretakers of the lands and waters on which I practice healing, the elders who lived here before, the Indigenous today, and the generations to come. I practice this by actively participating in learning from and volunteering for my local Lenape community and participating in the Rising Nation River Journey.
I believe you alone can decide who you are, and that your identity can never be dictated by anyone else, including a political party. I proudly serve as the President of the Board of Maverique Therapeutic Services, a non-profit dedicated to serving LGBTQ folks. And I serve on the board of the Palisades Democratic Alliance, my local political action group.
Neurodiversity Expertise
Leverage lived experience and expert insights on ADHD and neurodiversity to better understand and thrive in your unique mind. Develop your own Personal Operating Manual that works with your neurodivergent brain.
As the co-author of the book How to Understand and Deal with ADHD, being published Summer 2026, I have deeply researched the neurobiology of ADHD and the evidence based practices to work with, and not against, your ADHD brain.
Do you need support with time management, organization, motivation, the impact of your neurodivergence on your relationships, or being stuck in an ADHD shame spiral? I would be honored to walk you through those experiences and share my expertise with you.
Growing Emotional Intelligence and Professional Resilience
Build strength and adaptability in both your emotional and professional life with strategies focused on resilience and personal growth. With an undergrad degree in psychology, a law degree and a career in tech before I pivoted to coaching, I'm here to walk beside you wherever your path leads.
If you've been feeling alone, stuck in a shame spiral, or holding the weight of imposter syndrome, coaching can help you find your way back to your true self and the relationships that can support you.
Every person is unique, and I look forward to getting to know and the strengths and challenges you bring to the table. Reach out today to discover how you can befriend all parts of yourself through coaching at Parts of Us.
Begin your journey to deeper self-understanding and resilience
Pillars of Parts of Us Coaching
Internal Family Systems
My coaching approach is deeply rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS), a transformative model that helps individuals understand and harmonize the different parts of their inner selves. By guiding clients through this process, I empower them to build stronger emotional awareness and healthier relationships with themselves and others. I have experienced the power of the IFS model myself, and I love sharing its transformation with others.
I am also trained in IFIO, Intimacy From the Inside Out, an IFS model for couples.
Enneagram
I am a Certified Enneagram Coach, and when it would be useful for a client I incorporate the Enneagram, a powerful tool that clarifies core motivations and fears. This integration allows clients to gain insights into their giftings and challenges, paving the way for more inter-personal and professional growth.
I enjoy running a large online Enneagram community for people who identify as Enneagram Sixes, and whatever your Enneagram type, I would be glad to help you understand yourself, your core motivations, and your relationship dynamics in the context of the Enneagram.
Understanding the body as part of mental health
Brains, emotions, and physical bodies are one inseparable system. I teach body techniques that interrupt negative feedback loops and support your emotional health. My certification in Somatic Embodiment and Regulation helps me guide clients through exercises to regulate their nervous systems; and restore feelings of safety.
Neurodiversity and Anti-Colonial Worldview
As an author on ADHD and a neuro-diverse person, I bring expertise and lived experience to the coaching. This perspective enriches the support I provide, especially for men navigating neurodiversity.
My coaching philosophy is unapologetically anti-colonial, fostering a space that respects and honors diverse backgrounds and experiences. At Parts of Us Coaching, I am committed to creating an inclusive environment where all individuals can thrive authentically.
Sitting with Grief
We often find that beneath the parts of us designed to keep us safe from our own emotions, there is deep grief. This grief could be about things that have happened to us, those we have lost, or the state of our world. I am honored to sit with you in your grief and help you integrate it into your life. You can learn more about this at https://www.griefsupportcenter.com
Frequently Asked Questions
Do you offer online coaching sessions?
Yes, all coaching sessions are conducted online to provide flexible access regardless of geographic location.
How can I schedule a coaching session?
The first step is to schedule a free consult with me, which you can do through any of the yellow "schedule a free consult" buttons on this website. If we decide to move forward together, we will schedule ongoing sessions for as long as it's the right fit for you.
What does a session with you cost?
I charge $100/hour for coaching sessions.
What issues does your coaching help with?
My coaching helps with emotional regulation, understanding personal and professional challenges, improving resilience, clarifying life goals, and navigating neurodiverse experiences. I aim to help people connect with and befriend their inner parts using IFS (Internal Family Systems) and to regulate their nervous systems using my certification in Somatic coaching.
Who do you work with?
I primarily work with men who are looking to deepen their self-understanding, befriend their emotions, and build resilience in their professional and personal lives. However, I do not exclude anyone based on their gender identity. If you think I might be a good fit, reach out today.
Are you an author, and can I access your writings?
Yes, I am an author on ADHD and share insights from both my expertise and lived experience. You can order my book, How to Understand and Deal with ADHD.
You can also learn more about my co-author and wife, Charity O'Reilly, who is a trauma therapist providing therapy intensives in a retreat setting.
You can see both of our latest thoughts by visiting our blog at O'Reilly Trauma Healing.
How do I know if coaching is right for me?
Parts of Us aims to bridge the gap between formal therapy and typical coaching. Many coaches are present and future focused, and I enjoy bringing that focus too, but I also love doing deep work with all parts of you, including inner children. We will get to know the exiled and burdened parts of yourself who are still calling the shots in your life today. We will work together to connect with your Core Self, who can provide those parts the healing they need.
I cannot provide formal mental health diagnosis or medications, so if that is what you are looking for, I won't be the right fit for you.